'I never knew I carried so much emotional baggage, but now I know where to start', said Fathima during the discussion on forgiveness. She was one of the eleven participants, Muslim and Christian, attending a Creators of Peace Circle workshop arranged by a Muslim NGO, Baytul Nur on 10 and 11 December in Durban.
There was a lively atmosphere from the beginning as they showed an eagerness to hear what the workshop was all about. The group consisted of home based carers, counsellors, life skill trainees and volunteers.
It was encouraging to watch the progress in spirit from one day to the other as some participants discovered new aspects of peace, helping them to move forward in their lives. Michael expressed, 'This has helped me build my confidence and change without worrying what other people will say.'
Some of the group had been through or are currently still in abusive relationships. There were tears and pain shared - some for the first time. After having a time of silence, one person said that she was scared of ‘quietness’ as all her past came back again.
Many questions were asked as they together searched for the way through. 'If I forgive the person, what will they do next?” 'Why do people take me for granted when I forgive them?' 'Why do I have to forgive someone who has done wrong to me?'
Portia believes that in many ways the workshop was therapeutic, not because we had the answers, but it gave the participants a chance for soul searching and helped them towards what they needed personally and for their service in the community.
Shafiek was one of those who stated at the beginning that he had helped many people to find changes in their lives and would go out of his way to be there for them, but saw no reason to look at his own life. On the last day of the workshop he said, 'It opened my way of thinking. In the past I wouldn’t sit with people I didn’t know and share my life with them. I had my own choice of people, even in my family, but now I would know how to treat people differently…..I need to look at my life…It was the first time Ifelt peace of mind.'
The events manager of Baytul Nur asked us if we would consider in the future to network and partnership with them and train people to take the Creators of Peace Circle workshop into the Kwazulu-Natal community. This is being seriously considered on both sides.
Bukiwe Maseko, Portia Mosia, Cleo Mohloadi and Jackie Euvrard